“Actually there is no difference betwen the Kundalini Shakti and Adya, the original Shakti of the universe, except that the Kundalini Shakti has become individualized.”
Vimalananda was not one to repeat himself; as soon as he began to speak about something of interest to me I was expected to drop whatever I was doing and listen. Usually he picked moments when I was engrossed in some mundane matter like reading the newspaper, since drawing my atten tion to his words would disengage my mind at least temporarily from its attachment to the mundane.
[59]
AGHORA II: Kundalini
“That is why I call the Kundalini Shakti the ego. The ability to self-identify, to treat something as part of oneself, is ego. As long as the Kundalini Shakti self-identifies with the body She remains asleep. Once She awakens She searches for Her mate: Shiva, that fragment of the universal consciousness without which an individual cannot exist. When they merge that’s it; the play is over. It’s something like an electron finding its proton and merging with it.
“The Rishis, who are the only beings in our universe who can travel to the sun, have the full power of the Kundalini Shakti at their disposal. They can reach the sun in the instant they will themselves there, thanks to Her awe some might. Do you know the speed of the Kundalini Shakti? It’s immea surable, but since the Rishis can travel from here to the sun in less than one second its speed must be more than one hundred million miles per sec ond.”
I must have looked at him quizzically, for he emphasized, “Yes, I have been to college and have several degrees, so I know about the speed of light; but there is nothing faster than the speed of thought.
“The Kundalini Shakti is the highest possible expression of an individual’s will power. When you have purified your will so totally that it can be directed to a single object at a time-coherent just like a laser beam-then the Kundalini Shakti is operating in you, not before. Anything travelling that fast must have tremendous force behind it, and very few people can handle such power. This is why I get so wild when I read about all those people in America who claim either to have had their own Kundalinis awakened pain lessly, or to be awakening the Kundalinis of all and sundry effortlessly. Don’t ask me to believe such drivel. If it were so all of America would have merged with the infinite by now.”
Restraining his indignation with some effort, he continued.
“Why I am so outraged? Because the ordinary individual can at best, after long penances, become able to partially self-identify with the universe, or with a deity; whenever that self-identification becomes perfect the ego loses all concept of individuality and all contact with the body, which then disin tegrates. Once you lose your ability to identify yourself with imperfection, how will you be able to continue to exist in our imperfect world? All the swamis and sadhus nowadays who talk about the awakening of Kundalini are really talking about Her partial awakening, whether they realize it or not. You may accidentally awaken your Kundalini partially, or a saint may par tially awaken it for you, but that is not the end; it is only the beginning, which is why so many aspirants go astray.”
[ 60 ]KUNDALINI
A brief pause signified that this applied particularly to me.
“In an ordinary individual the ego resides at the lower end of the spinal cord because gravity has full power over Her. So long as She lies there sleep ing the individual remains in ignorance. If you want to liberate the ego from Her restrictions you must create a force within your body to counteract the force of gravity; this can only be done by strenuous penance. The purpose of all spiritual practices in every religion is to disengage the ego from Her identification with the limited personality so that She may reunite with Her perennial personality.
“Whether you do it slowly or quickly, you have to rip your ego away from your nerves when you practice Kundalini Yoga, and this will come as quite a shock to your organism. The ego has such a strong grip on the body that it is impossible for most people to do this. In fact, some die of shock when Kundalini is awakened, and others become severely ill. Indiscriminate awak ening of the Kundalini is very dangerous. Everyone is doomed to die, of course, but dying disoriented in pain and fear will ruin your chances for a good rebirth.
“If your nervous system is strong it can endure a great deal of shakti before disintegrating, which is why penance is required. If you do the prac tices your guru sets for you and control your tongue and your penis-”
“Or if you are a woman?”
“Or your clitoris, you can create nerves of steel. I’m sorry, but if you think you can dare to awaken Kundalini and survive while living in a body that has been weakened by dissipation you are living in a fool’s paradise. How do you think Moses was able to withstand his experience with God? Only because of his long penances. Moses described a burning bush which burned but was not consumed. That bush was his own brain and nervous system, ignited by God.
“Kundalini has been described as vidyut lata, the “lightning creeper.” Think of how a creeping vine clings to a tree; and then think of that vine as a lightning stroke, a bolt of billions of volts of energy which would splinter or incinerate any ordinary tree, or bush. But Moses was destined for greatness, and his nerves, though severely strained, were able to take the sudden flash of pure consciousness that God graced him with. How few are able to do this!
“If you could just for a moment experience the power of a fully awakened Kundalini Shakti you would know what bull is being put out by these phony Yogis who say that the Kundalini can be felt as a creepy feeling in the spine, or as a cool breeze in the palm. Creepy feeling, my foot! And to con
1611
AGHORA II: Kundalini
trol Kundalini, do you think it is some sort of joke? Never! For an ordinary human to control Kundalini is impossible, or nearly so. Only immortals can properly control Her.
“No, raising Kundalini in an uncontrolled way is not the answer. You don’t become enlightened or become a yogi just because your Kundalini is aroused. There is a great potential for abuse of this power. As long as it goes up it’s fine, but when it falls, it falls like a thunderbolt.”
“Like in the Bible where Jesus says, ‘I saw the devil fall like lightning from Heaven?’”
“Yes. Jesus was talking about the devil of the uncontrolled ego, who tempts us to indulge in the pleasures of the mundane world. Isn’t life in the mundane world really hell? And it is an endless torment, because we are reborn into it over and over again. To rise above all this misery you must raise your Kundalini, in a controlled way.”